Looking for something…

From Summertime! 2007

Lately I have felt a little at odds with everything – like I am looking for something. Maybe I’m just itchy for building something like I have been wanting to do or playing something I haven’t wanted to do in years. Get ready for some truly scattered thoughts …. it’s time for a rambling post!

The desire to build something

I always have a desire to build. Sometimes I really don’t care what it is – fixing something around the house, doing something in the backyard, installing new light fixtures, building software. Sometimes it’s great to just feel your hands are rough and tired from doing something, you know? But it’s the summer time and I even more so want to build something! I know I need to (sometime soon):

  • build a climbing wall/staircase/ladder to the backyard “treehouse” for the kids (it is a little scary to climb)
  • build quite a few flower window boxes for the house windowsUntil now I really haven’t had any decent tools at all – just cheap screwdrivers and some hand saws. But I have finally acquire something decent to cut with – recently I found a used Sears circular saw that I figure should work out or get repaired since it has a lifetime warranty. Isa also bought me some Sears screwdrivers for Father’s Day – it’s amazing the difference between cheap and high quality screwdrivers!The desire to play musicI also have been feeling like something that goes back to my childhood. It’s probably not an interesting story but I like to tell it and say it’s interesting: when I was somewhere probably around 10 years old, my parents had me taking piano lessons and we owned a piano. But as some point, they decided to stop my lessons and sell the piano. Not soon after, they bought a computer (I’m fairly sure it was a 286SX) – which after some time I began to start playing with… and how many years later, found myself pretty much determined that would be my job (and it is – doing software development). Hmm – makes me wonder if they decided to keep the piano 🙂
    Anyway, I’ve been listening to more classical (specifically piano) music especially when I’m working or driving home, and have been contemplating trying to get into playing music like I did when I was a kid. I’ve even started to look around on the local craigslist… maybe I can find one for cheap to see if I’m serious about getting into music. Time well tell.The desire to cook better foodNot just that but I’ve been wondering about trying my hand at cooking (Isa has been interested in it because I get off earlier than her and have been cooking dinner) a little more than just the really basic stuff. I did try cooking a Greek meal that Isa said was decent (the kids hated it though :)).I saw at work some leftover Chinese … I wonder if it’s fairly easy to cook good Chinese food? I wonder if you really have to use a wok…Now that I write this all out, maybe
    this is some sort of outpouring from something I read lately about the X things you must experience in life to be “happy” (I do recall reading on some website/blog something like this recently). I really don’t believe that but I really do want to try different things especially to experience with my kids and wife.I do know that I have enough in my life to be truly joyful about. I am simply blessed to have a loving woman who supports me and pushes me even when I don’t want to figure out what’s up with what I’m feeling. And kids that really could care less but always can make me smile (especially looking over recent pictures/videos on Picasa like this one). Who do I have to thank? I know for sure I haven’t reached where I am at in my life because of me… and I really don’t believe it was due to some luck or random chance. Thank you God. Boy I never would have thought this is what I really need either.
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